Living it out

Comfortably coming up in the suburbs where a suburban was standard and not superb, my life has been stubborn to suffering.  I shutter and stutter at the noise of any slight nuisance, forgetting there are those alive who still remember the nuance needed to avoid the noose.  I spew this spoilage of love from my mouth but my words just spoil my soul into thinking speaking is enough to help hurting hearts.  So I cope using the cop out that if I speak the gospel, the power of God will make the sound of my words powerful.  Accepting such a passive mind is inhibiting me from inhabiting God’s ambition to strip the world of it’s inhibitions to treat all humans with inherit dignity.  But how can I hold that Jesus changes the hearts he holds when the hearts he’s holding can hold contempt for whole people groups ?? My section has let preferences of sex shun them from attempting community with a company of people.  The Lord’s lair is supposed to be layered with people who love their neighbor as themself, yet often I feel like a liar laying in the attire of a privileged position where I don’t have to empathise with another’s position.  The enemy of change lies in comfortability and the energy for this enemy comes from within the inner me that has enmity with selfless sacrifice.  So when the future finds me retired in my savings, I hope I’ve saved savings for my savior of doing and being Jesus and not just speaking Jesus.

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